


Back Home Again

by iOpheliaBlues



Category: Final Fantasy 7, Final Fantasy 7 Remake - Fandom, Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII Remake - Fandom
Genre: F/M, FF7R, FF7R Spoilers, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:33:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23690128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iOpheliaBlues/pseuds/iOpheliaBlues
Summary: A detailed moment from Cloud Strife's POV of the scene during chapter 14's resolution scene. Recommended to play or see the scene first before reading.-When Cloud Strife is unable to shake his anxieties off, he is met with the unexpected. He soon realises his own resolution, coming to terms with what he must do.
Relationships: Aerith Gainsborough & Cloud Strife, Aerith Gainsborough/Cloud Strife
Comments: 6
Kudos: 114





	Back Home Again

**Author's Note:**

> So - as I was replaying chapter 14, I came up with the idea of retelling this scene with a little more depth and from Cloud's POV. Here's the song that plays in the scene, if you want to listen to it whilst reading, go on ahead.  
> https://youtu.be/csBZAfkcpEU
> 
> Warning that I didn't have a beta reader. My usual beta reader hasn't finished (or even started...) the game yet.

Chilled breeze travelled through the quiet, rustic room, followed by the soft whistle of the wind and rustling of flowers. The cold air grazed against his skin as he stared out of the open window. Even though the room had a chilly breeze – he felt uncomfortably hot. He laid there, arms tucked behind his head as he watched the stars glistened. Something plagued his mind, however, as he let out the air he hadn’t realised he held in.  
  
_How is she?_  
_Is she okay?_  
_Why didn’t I do more?_  
…

Cloud thought to himself. There were so many questions left unanswered, and he knew it would ultimately never stop hassling him until he found out. After all, he had already been laying in bed for hours, wondering the same thing over and over, unable to get a peaceful night’s rest.

As the wind’s soft howling grew gentler and the cold breeze became less frosty, he slowly shifted his body upwards from the comfort of the pillowy sheets, taking in the scenery around the Gainsborough’s household.

There was so much to take in that night. The dark blue night skies sparkled with sheets of stars, flowers all seemed to dance in the breeze underneath the shining sky.

In truth… he could see himself living a life like this. A calm one. One with no more worries, anxieties, the fear of losing someone he held dear – and even though tonight was a sight to behold, his heart couldn’t stop racing from the fear that something was happening to her... To the one he was supposed to guard with all his life, Aerith.

An unusual sound of rustling clothes snapped him back to reality, his attention was immediately drawn to the whereabouts of the noise.

“Is… that…?”  
  
His voice barely could croak out of his throat, unsure if his eyes were betraying him.

From below, he spotted a slim figure crouching down into the bed of pale yellow flowers. A brown haired woman, hair tied into a neat plait that went down to her small waist. The iconic pink bow, that sat onto of her plait, blew against the breeze. _Her_.   
  
Was this… real? Another one of his delirious visions he had been dealing with? Was she real?

He had to check. He had to find out.

* * *

Cloud had practically sprinted downstairs towards the door. He tried his best to make sure he was as quiet as possible, but he couldn’t stop thinking about her. No way this was real, right?  
  
As he opened the front door and took a deep breath, fully preparing for the disappointment that was coming his way, he took a small step outside.

There she was. Amongst the sea of flowers that engulfed her surroundings, she crouched there, her gaze locked with the familiar yellow lilly that Cloud remembered all too well. “Lovers used to give these when they were reunited...”, he remembered her soft voice say as she placed one upon the strap of his vest. Their first meeting, a moment he would never forget.

His feet couldn’t move fast enough, but no matter what, he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. There was just no way she was there, stood a mere few feet away, acting as careless as always…

Cloud’s boots had never felt heavier than that moment. He ambled towards Aerith, his eyes never leaving her – he was so sure that in a single blink, she would disappear from his sights again.

Finally, when he made it to her side, the plaited haired girl glanced towards him. She offered him a gentle smile, perhaps in hopes to ease his nervousness? He couldn’t tell. All he knew… was that she was here, right in front of him and hadn’t dissolved into thin air right before his eyes.  
Honestly, it took him more by surprise than he realised.

“How is this…?”

He stared at her, a subtle hint of confusion had swept over his face. Suddenly, once he could tear his gaze away from her, he scanned around the sky – no longer just painted with shining stars, but sheets of a green mist that travelled through the sky above.

“Is this a dream?” He let out with uncertainty. He hadn’t fallen asleep- least, he didn’t think he had, but in truth, he was hoping otherwise. He was hoping that Aerith’s kidnapping WAS the dream, and this was the reality he was in. Standing on the hilltop under a glistening sky with the girl he…

“Maybe. You tell me.” she stood up from her spot, flashing him another warm smile. One that was always first to greet Cloud every time he saw her kind face.

Whether it was a dream or not, Cloud needed to hear it. He needed answers. He needed to know how she was and what was going on. The questions were all burning inside of him, all looking for an answer that would satiate his anxieties.

“You okay?” was all he could muster at that moment.

“Don’t I look it?”

A small moment past. Both of them knew she wasn’t okay, deep down. No matter what Aerith told Cloud, he knew she wasn’t okay. He knew she was putting up a front for him.

He supposed that upon her realising that, she followed up quickly, “I used to live in the Shinra Building, back when I was really little.” she held her posture and kept composed.

Cloud kept his eyes on her throughout. He nodded in response.  
  
“Your mom told us.”

“Right. So it kinda feels like I’ve gone back to my childhood home, you know? Honestly, it’s not that bad.”

She spoke with so much certainty and confidence that part of it tinged inside Cloud’s chest. He knew oh-so well what she was trying to do… and God, he hated it. He wished, for one moment, she would be honest with him about it. It partly irritated him.

“So what? You wanna stay?” he muttered, trying desperately not to let his voice betray him.

“C’mon, Cloud,” Aerith retorted jokingly back, both knowing full well what she really felt, “Don’t be silly.”

Aerith let her head hang, looking down at Cloud’s, now muddied, black boots, her hair slightly covering the front of her face and eyes. He wasn’t sure what to say to her, but he knew he couldn’t stay mad. Throughout the time journeying with Aerith, if there was one thing he learnt on their adventure, it was that she was always putting others before herself. From the beginning when she walked him through the dark tunnels of the Collapsed Expressway, to helping him find and save Tifa – even now, when he knew she was unsafe and so unsure of how things would turn out, she wanted nothing more than to assure those around her not to worry about her.

It was something he really learnt to admire about her… something he loved about her.

“Your mom’s really worried too.” Cloud spoke up, hoping that mentioning her mom would make her reconsider her stance. All he wanted was just for her to be honest with him, to tell him she wanted to come home to her mom. To him.

Somehow though, something else caught her attention. A slight glimmer seemed to shine in her emerald green eyes, followed by her usual mischievous smile. “’Too’? So you’re worried about me?”

_Damn_. He was caught. Well… he supposed he played into that one.

However, for once, he couldn’t seem to come up with any witty, sarcastic response. Instead, he found himself looking away. He contemplated his words for a little moment, before carrying his gaze to meet with hers.  
  
“Of course I am.”

Whether it was his tired eyes, his subtle but firm, concerned voice, or even his body language that seemed to take over, it certainly left an odd atmosphere for them both. He wasn’t used to anyone seeing this side of him, and he was sure Aerith was probably feeling a little taken back by his worry for her.

For once, she let her smile fade as she turned away from him. A moment where she let her guard down, no longer putting the facade up. Cloud was sure she turned away from him still to avoid letting him see her true worries at heart.  
  
“I’m sorry about that.” she spoke softly, “Really.”

As she let her words fall from her lips, she turned towards the green mist that filled the blue skies, gently pressing her palms together into a ball and held it tightly. Cloud slowly stumbled behind her, he couldn’t make out her expression as she spoke.

“Everyone dies eventually.”

  
A tiny gasp escaped Cloud’s lips. Those words felt like a knife to his heart. As true as they were, he wanted to argue back – that it wasn’t her time, that he could save her if the chance was given to him. To please let him go and save her and bring her home.

He hated those poisoned words. It hurt him more than he felt before.

Unsure of what to say, he forced his gaze down to the flowers that rustled beneath his boots.

“I suppose.” his voice sounded worn out, as though he felt trapped within the emotions in himself, unsure of what line he should draw before he became too concerned, too connected to her. Unsure of what he was feeling inside anymore. Anger? Fear? Worry? Despair? Hurt?

He couldn’t understand it. Why she couldn’t see that he needed her to be okay. To be alive and safe with him.

“So we need to make the most of the time we have- to live our lives the way we wanna live.”

Cloud watched her move slowly, her stare off into the blue abyss above.

“Every minute…. Every moment, matters.”

Her words seemed to ring in Cloud’s heart. ‘Live our lives the way we wanna live’, she repeated in his mind. Half wanting to scoff, knowing that she, right at that moment, wasn’t living how she wanted to live. That she was locked away suffering, whilst he sat back and could only wait. Whilst the other half… desperately held back the pain that her words inflicted on him.

“I’ll remember that.” He returned to her, his voice restraint, no longer able to suppress the slight discomfort the conversation was having on him. In truth, he wanted to say more… to do more, but he couldn’t make false promises. He didn’t know what the future had installed, but if she… if something happened to her before he could save her, she would have gone knowing he never kept that promise. He couldn’t live with that. Even if this was all a dream.

He knew fully well what her words meant, that they had intended for this moment to be her last with him– and that she wanted to treasure it, no matter the circumstances.

When Aerith turned her attention to him, Cloud could feel his heart sink a little. She was finally letting her guard drop, but it only made him ache even more. “Good.” She let out in a doleful tone, her expression slowly began to shift to a melancholy expression. He wasn’t used to seeing her this way, and deep down inside, swore he would never let her feel this way again. He glanced briefly at the flowers around, the night sky that shimmered with the green orbs and mist that eloped it. At that moment, an small inner resolution had settled in his mind. He had to make her smile. That even though he couldn’t make her a false promise, he would make sure she knew that he was there for her.

Cloud let a small, empathetic, smile curl the corners of his lips. “You need to embrace this moment. Right?”

She smiled back, and for a change, felt genuine this time. His efforts were rewarded. He knew she had things she had to let out, just like he did. He wanted her to have this moment, and decided to stay quiet and just listen.

“I’m glad I met you, Cloud. I really am. I’m grateful for all the words we’ve shared. For all the moments and the memories. You’ve made me more happy than you know. And I’ll always cherish what you’ve given me...”  
  
Cloud tried desperately not to let his emotions take over. This was her moment to speak, but damn, did it hurt to hear her speak as though this was her last.

“But...” Aerith calming voice became almost a whisper. The brief hesitation made Cloud raise a brow. It wasn’t like her to be so wordless. He listened in even more intently, not wanting to miss a single word.

“But whatever happens,” her foot stumbled a little against the ground, slowly, she took a step toward and locked eyes with Cloud’s. A moment of clarity seemed to click in her eyes. He could practically hear his heart beating from his chest. “You can’t fall in love with me.” She declared, stern and unshaken.

_‘You can’t fall in love with me’?…_

The breath that Cloud held in, all suddenly escaped into a small gasp. He turned his head to the side, he could feel his heart… his chest, beating fast. His cheeks grew a tint of red. Cloud had never felt such a mix of emotions so fast. At first, a sharp pain had travelled through his body.  
  
He couldn’t fall in love with her? Why not? What was so wrong with falling for her? Had he done something wrong?

Afterwards, a wave of disappointment and guilt had taken over.

Was he… not allowed to finally fall in love?

He couldn’t help it. None of this was ever his choice. If he could throw his feelings away, he would have. If he could stop falling for her, he would have. But… he couldn’t do it. Every moment they spent together, not a single dull moment, felt so alive to him. He finally felt like he had a place he belonged, and someone he belonged with. Someone who cherished him for him, accepted him as not just a merc or a SOLDIER, but as… him.

He didn’t want to stop falling for her. He couldn’t.

The more he thought on her words, the more confused and painful it felt. He let out another small gasp, trying to stop his breath from hitching. He wasn’t even aware of how breathless he felt. Everything felt like it was spinning.

A small, warm touched grazed against his cheek and he was brought back to attention. When he realised it was Aerith’s small and gentle hand, he felt the warm of his body travel to his cheeks, his own body shivered in response to her touch. Aerith, at a slow pace, moved closer to Cloud. She had to make sure his blue-green tinted eyes were locked with hers.  
  
“Even if you think you have… it’s not real.” she uttered, slowly withdrawing her warm hand away.

_Don’t say that…_

Cloud thought to himself. He knew she was trying to prevent him from coming to get her, from saving her, from the dangers of the organisation he had been trampled on for many years, Shinra, and what they would do if they caught him. She didn’t want to risk him endangering his life for her… at least, that’s what he hoped she didn’t want.

Surprisingly, in that moment, he was more sure than anything that he was too deeply in love with her.

As she withdrew her hand, he tried hard to grab hold of that warmth he quickly grew attached to, he wanted to say so much to her. To tell her she was wrong, that he loved her so much. To pull her close and promise to come get her. That this wasn’t the last she’d see of him. No matter what. But, as he grabbed hold, Aerith’s hand faded into a green glow, leaving nothing but the cold air against the palms of his hands. He stared at his glove for a brief moment, missing the moments he was able to hold her hands, her arms, her, close to his. He balled his hand gently together.

“Do I get a say in all this?”

_Do I get a choice in falling in love with you?_

“It’s almost morning. Time to go.” Aerith’s body began to dissolve into a cloud of green orbs, slowly, she would join the green mists and orbs that lingered above in the sky.

“I’m coming for you.” Cloud declared. He knew he couldn’t make false promises to her, but this wasn’t one of them. He knew, no matter who said what, Elmyra, Barret, Tifa or Aerith, this was something he wanted to do. To live his life the way he wanted and find her.

She turned to face him, she took a moment to glimpse into his eyes. Cloud was silent, but he knew she saw it in his eyes. In that moment, as she gave him a tender smile, finally coming to her own conclusion.

“If that’s what you want. Thank you.”

As her body slowly faded and the orbs dissolved into the sky, Cloud let the cold breeze blow against his relaxed body.

_I’m coming for you, Aerith._

_Let’s go home together._

This was finally something he was sure of. That he needed to be with her and show her that he truly, from the bottom of his heart, had fallen in love with her.


End file.
